On Mortality

Almost every time my words get printed, I read it and think "dang, I wish I had said this (or that)."  I don't think I've ever written anything that I wouldn't change something.  I'm my own worst critic.

Maybe it's part of getting old, although I've not yet met my dad's definition of truly old (80), but I'm thinking more about time and things like that.  I wrote about carpe diem a couple of weeks ago.  That's sort of what I'm talking about.

So that carpe diem piece left some things out.  Like mortality.  And the fact that I've lived well over half my life.  I've got to admit it--right after checking the sports pages and the editorial page, I head for the obituaries.  Looking, I guess, for someone I might know.

Maybe it's my early entrance to geezer-dom but the first thing I look for is their age.  Were they younger than me?  Yes?  Dang.  That's young.  Then I look for some clue as to what got them there.

The bottom line is that we aren't promised tomorrow.   Somebody that you talked to yesterday is gone today.  I wrote about that recently too.   That very thing happened to some friends this week.

I find myself wanting to squeeze every moment of every day.  I'm missing a lot of things because I work too much but that is both a choice I make every day and a part of me that I can't let go.    But every day I have doubts about the choices I make about the use of the time.  Any more, it seems like I'm making those choices based on that carpe diem stuff.

I've even passed on a couple of bike rides recently, opting for a fun mountain bike ride with Ken Bell rather than get my behind kicked on a slobberknocker ride with a group of riders all better than me. 

My bucket list is short.  I'd like to see Machu Picchu.  I want to see what kind of adults my grandchildren become (but that doesn't count).  I want to see a night football game at LSU.  Eating my way across northern Italy is in there somewhere.  I'd like to get good at fly fishing and take lots more hikes with my wife.

But those things are events that I can make happen if I really want to.  What about today?  What about this moment?

Coaches everywhere tell their young charges to enjoy every single game.  That (in high school football anyway) they only get ten opportunities to play the game they may have played as long as they could remember.

Just this week I heard Derek Hunt tell his team "you're only guaranteed four more of these games--don't waste these opportunities."  It seems like only yesterday that I saw many of these same young men playing middle school football. 

And for the seniors, it's winding down.  Quickly.  Oh, there are the playoffs and teams around here have a habit of playing a lot of those but that's a different season.  It's maybe one and done then.

I would tell athletes everywhere to enjoy every minute of it.  Enjoy the practices, even though they can be hard.  It is an opportunity to get better and prove yourself. 

Enjoy the friendships that you will make.  You are forming bonds that will last forever.  Even now, when I see high school teammates  J.L. Millsaps or Lonnie Hawkins, there is a bond that time cannot erode.  And I might see them once every couple of years. 

Enjoy the locker room and the coaches and the smiling parents after a game.  The fans, the work, and the attention.  Enjoy every minute of it.  All too soon, it will be over.